Tuesday, January 14, 2014

The Waiting Game - Am I, or Aren't I? (Month 1 of Trying)

Could I Be?

T-minus 8 more days until we find out if the first month of trying worked. I don’t even have any tests at home. I should buy some, huh?

I can tell you last week I had a rough time eating breakfast and couldn’t swallow down my beloved coffee. (We’re talking chocolate glazed Dunkin Donuts coffee too.) What is that about? Could be stress. Could be anxiety. I mean, that would be awfully early in the game, don’t you think?

Karl laughs at me when I say, “I know my body.” But I DO. Like nothing else.

Friday, I met with our Realtor who walked me through our townhouse and told me all the things I had to do if we want to sell or rent. Let’s just say I’m feeling VERY overwhelmed. VERY. Like, that frozen- state-of-mind-can’t-start-anything-because-i-don’t-even-know-where-to-begin.

I also feel like a hoarder. So I watched an episode of Hoarders. That sparked some motivation. And some serious itching.  

Last night I started getting pains in my left tonsil. I was also VERY crabby. My brain couldn’t think. I let Jackson dump the frozen carrots all over the floor because I didn’t know what else to do to keep him from whining. It is very very very cold out. Our freezer went out. I managed to cook a steak dinner. I cut everything up in bite size pieces for Jackson. I tried to listen to Karl’s day and answer his questions and process things he was telling me, but all the while block out Jackson’s whining. It felt like too much. Like my brain might spill over the information in it from my work day too. Was it really that much??

In the middle of the night I woke up a bazzilion times with my throat throbbing. Finally around 4 a.m. I took Advil. I know I shouldn’t take Advil right now but it’s all we had and I needed SOME sleep. When I stood up, the room started spinning. I couldn’t stop it. And it’s been like that all morning. Either I have vertigo or some kind of bug or maybe just maybe it’s another sign that something is cooking in me?? My ears do feel a little clogged.

One thing I remember that first month we found out Jackson was on the way was I ended up getting back-to-back colds in August. Simply getting sick with a cold was already really unusual for me. But twice?
Something was UP. I think I read that the immune system of a pregnant woman goes down. True? Not sure. 

My chest feels a little tender and I have been using the bathroom a lot, BUT I also drink a ton of water and have been drinking HOT HOT HOT tea since we’re in a historic arctic blast right now. A lot of this can be in my head too. The brain is SO POWERFUL.  

One thing I’ve been following is a little article I found in my Women’s Health Magazine. It lists some of the best foods to eat to boost fertility. I’ve also added quite a bit of fish to our diets. Why? I ran out of my prenatal fish oil vitamins and wanted the real stuff. It’s better anyway. But it’s expensive though. One pound of wild salmon was $37. That’s a quarter of our weekly grocery budget. The only thing I haven’t had is the buckwheat listed. I’ve never cooked with it so I guess it’s something that has peaked my interest and we’ll be trying soon even if this month works or doesn’t. It’s healthy, right?

That’s about all I have. A friend sent me a link that freaked the ba-jezzes out of me. I still laughed at it though because I’m almost positive it’s spot on. I guess I should just focus on #2 and NOT #3. I kind of have this problem of jumping ahead. Can you tell?  http://shortwinded.net/so-you-would-like-to-have-three-children/


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