So the last "almost" three month have been spent learning how to be a mother. Dear God, I will say these past three months have been the HARDEST three months of my life. Nobody could have prepared me for this. No book. No person. No blog. Nobody. But, I will say I feel like once this week [week 11] hit, I finally started to get the hang of things. *huge sigh of relief* A little bit of a routine has been established and I'm understanding Jackson's cues and cries. I can once again do multiple things at once. I can focus solely on b-feeding when it's that time (OK...I do check Facebook from time to time and catch up on some shows) and enjoy that precious time. I'm getting more than four hours of sleep. I can cook once again (not totally there just yet but good enough for now). I'm thinking things can only start looking up from here on out.
|Bod before baby...|
But then I try to put on a pair of non-maternity pants or shorts or capris - all that loosely fit me last summer - and I can't even get them up past my thighs. WTF. Part of me wants to cry. Part of me wants to freak out and invest in stretchy pants. And part of me just feels flat out frustrated. What the heck am I going to wear to work?? I better figure out something because I have two in a half more weeks before I go back! There's a huge part of me dying to get back into a workout schedule like I had before, and a much healthier eating pattern, but right now, I can't. There is not enough time in the day and I haven't quite figured out how to fit it in. I try to go to the gym at night, but that's when Karl gets home and I DO really like spending time with my hubs! Otherwise, I feel a little jipped out of my time with him and I want to give him a little break since he's been at work all day. I can't just dump Jackson on him.
I worked out my entire pregnancy just so my body COULD bounce back. I will say I'm pretty sure all that working out did help my body recover faster - but it sure didn't help the delivery go any smoother or quicker. I think it was around day four when I got on the scale and 15 pounds were gone like that. Day 7 and I was down 20. But then my husband bought a bread maker and I would eat bags of chocolate and I was eating whatever I could find time to push down my throat the last three months. I've been battling those last 15 pounds. I'd like to lose an additional 20 but I don't want to overwhelm myself. I need to be realistic here.
My weight goes a little like this, and mind you I'm 5'10"....
High school -125 lbs (freshman and sophomore years - yes, people thought I was anorexic)
High school - 135 lbs (junior year)
High school - 145 lbs (senior year...I worked at McDonald's and would order an Arch Deluxe, supersize fry...milkshake and take home a hot fudge sundae three nights a week....Oh, the life!)
Freshman year in college 170 lbs (hello weight lifting and breadbowl salads from Perkins and the cereal bar at the campus cafeteria...and I was introduced to alcohol... Little puffy might I say?)
Sophomore through Junior year - 163 lbs
Senior year - 169 lbs (my BFF and I would run to the grocery store, buy candy...eat it as we ran back and then order a triple order of cheese breadsticks and eat the whole thing...)
Post college when I moved to Minnesota - 179 lbs (beer...poker...pizza...beer and more beer and a crapload of working out to make sure I could eat and drink that much. Obviously that doesn't work!)
When I met Karl - 170 lbs (started not being such a freak about working out two times a day because I was so busy getting to know my sweetie pie...)
When Karl proposed -160 lbs (I started cooking my own foods and started drinking 2% milk instead of fat free stuff. Gave up all sugar free and fake stuff. Ate only REAL foods and in smaller portions. Worked out only a few times a week.)
Wedding day - 142 lbs (Skinny ass. Dress had to be taken in two sizes.)
After Honeymoon - 148 lbs (We went all out and ate and drank like Kings. BEST TRIP EVER!)
Pre-baby - I was between 152-154 for two in a half years and hired a trainer to tone me up! My body fat went from 22% to 18%!! I started cooking kick ass healthy meals from all my healthy magazines.
9 months pregnant - 192 lbs (Yep, totally freaked out. Remembered how long it took to get down into the 150s but kind of hoped baby weighed 30 lbs (not really for pain's sake). But kept my weight under 200. That was my goal.)
3 months AFTER baby - 167-170 lbs (I must stop baking and snacking on CRAP! But I'm at home and put anything in my mouth. And I only go on walks for my daily workouts. Not a big enough calorie burn. And I'm breastfeeding. I do not want to mess with my milk supply so I don't want to lose too quickly!)
That's my weight in a nutshell. My awesome trainer from Life Time Fitness was so sweet he offered to train me for FREE (as a congrats on baby). Now every week he holds me accountable by emailing me for my workouts. I need 3-4 cardio and 2-3 lifts in a week. Right now I have no problem meeting cardio because I walk everyday (it's a little tough with it being SO hot out though). It's the lifting that's hard because I can't ever find time to get to the gym. But my sweet mom bought me free-weights and I got an exercise band in the mail from renewing a magazine subscription, so I can do my lifting routine at home. It just won't be as great. But if I can get one good one in at the gym a week, maybe I can get two in at home.
I also just started making a healthy protein filled breakfast every morning so I can make getting Jackson ready, eating breakfast and myself getting ready work when I get up and start going to work again. One day it's two eggs with veggies, a slice of Karl's homemade bread with flax and a side of fresh fruit. The next day it's oatmeal topped with fruit and flax. I need more protein in there and am going to try mixing in Greek Yogurt to see if that will do the trick or Protein Whey. I noticed if I START off with a healthy meal, I am more likely to stick with it all day. I stopped baking (sorry Karl). So hoping to peal off at least 1-2 pounds a week and get back into the 150s SOON!! For now, I'll be wearing the same pants to work for a little while.
I just need to figure out when I can go to the grocery store once I start up work again and when exactly we'll be eating since I'm going to want to spend every second with Jackson once I pick him up from homecare. This should be interesting! Anyone have any tricks???