Can you still be a writer AND a mom?
I think most of you know I have this major dream of becoming a writer. Sometimes I can even visualize myself as a published author. This is how it plays out.... Supermom to my son Jackson by day, writing and living out my dream by night AND being able to provide for the three of us. I don't want to give myself false hope, but that is what I see. Yet sometimes things don't always happen as quickly as we'd like them too or at all like we planned them. And we have to keep trying until maybe...just maybe... one day that new door of exciting opportunity will open for us.
Yes, oh, yes...it's easier to give up on all those personal goals and dreams than keep fighting for them sometimes. Okay, a LOT of times. But those who keep at it and keep believing are usually the ones who grow and make it.
Back in 2010, I wrote my first novel and then in 2011 started to query it out to agents. I had a lot of bites, but no offers of representation. What I did get was a lot of great feedback from agents and learned a lot about my writing and the ins and outs of the publishing industry. In short, it's very subjective out there. Currently I have a few requests out to read my first 100 pages of my manuscript (yay!) but am also in the midst of revising from all the feedback I have received.
The problem I'm dealing with is finding time. I work full time. I have a five month old. I'm a wife. I am the keeper of our finances and house and nutrition....OK...pretty much everything. So how does one still follow her dream, not lose sight of oneself and all those big goals, AND still be a good mom and wife?
I don't want to lose myself! I'm deathly scared I am and sometimes I cry because I grieve the old Christie and the life I used to have. Oh...all that time I used to have. Where did it go? And all that control... buh bye.
While writing my first book, I joined a critique group. This group is full of wonderful woman - with all different backgrounds. Some are just getting married, one lives in Brazil, others are having babies and one is a full-time mom of three kids. I can relate to her. She's quite the amazing woman. She drinks coffee like water, sleeps little and powers through novel after novel, even finding time to read too. I admire her so much and asked her how she does it.
In honor of her latest book, Love Blossoms, coming out (which I was able to critique for her), she wrote a guest post on my blog!!! This is how awesome she is. She even makes time to leave a post for me. Wow. Where on earth does she find the time, you ask???? Read below...
Hi, Christie! First, let me thank you for inviting me over to your blog. I’m super excited to be here. It’s been seven months since my debut novella launched the new Honey Creek imprint at Turquoise Morning Press. Now, I’m back with book two in my Seeds of Love series. I’m hooked on this enchanting little town and can’t keep myself away for long. But, sometimes, life demands I leave the books alone. A mommy’s life is like that.
|The fabulous Julie - author (and mommy) of Seeds of Love Series|
My youngest child is four now. She was a tiny little thing when I started writing. She was waking a few times a night and nursing every time I turned around. I had a potty training son at the time and was starting my first year as a home schooling mom for my five year old. Times were crazy. Time was nutty nuts wrapped in nougat. And I discovered writing helped me feel sane in the midst of it all.
Four years have passed since that time. I’m still out of shape and caffeine addicted. (Some things didn’t change). But, I’m still in survival mode. Today’s format is just different. It’s still a circus over here. Things get easier, but more complicated. I get more sleep and I’m done changing diapers, but my kids need more things than they used to. Rides to ball games and gifts for friends’ parties. Homework help replaced potty training, and dating advice will soon replace that too. I’m glad to have something just for me, even if I don’t get as much time as I want to do it today. Words makes me happy. I try to find time to read and write when I can because it’s my escape. Thanks to the Kindle, I learned to read on the treadmill. Multi-tasking at its finest. And it makes me a nicer person. Trust me. My love of writing will be here when they’re gone.
I think having an escape is the key to semi-sanity. And really, semi-sanity is what I aspire to these days. Sadly, as my kids grow, they need me less and less. *sniffles* And one day my house will be spotless because I will be alone all day, wishing the house was still cluttered with kids and their friends eating chips on my couch and wearing shoes on my carpet. But that’s then, and this is now. Today, I’m trying really hard to embrace the now because too soon I know it will be gone.
Mother of three, wife to a sane person and Ring Master at the Lindsey Circus. Most days you'll find me online, amped up on caffeine & wielding a book.
You can find my blogging about the writer life at Musings from the Slush Pile
Tweeting my crazy at @JulieALindsey
Reading to soothe my obsession on GoodReads
And other books by me on Amazon
If you’re in the mood for a sweet romantic read with a very happy ending, I hope you’ll visit Honey Creek. The sun is setting, bullfrogs are croaking and the crickets are singing, “Come on.” Sweet tea or hot cider. Fresh summer strawberries or crisp fall apples. You’ll find it there. And taking a trip to Honey Creek is as easy as Amazon : ) I hope to see you there!
Jillian thought she had everything she needed until Jackson walked through her door…
There’s a wedding coming to Honey Creek and the whole town’s preparing for the party. When Jillian Parker agreed to host a few groomsmen at her inn, she had no idea what she was getting into. One of those groomsmen is Jackson Tate, and he’s making her concentration completely impossible. He’s funny, fascinating, frustrating, and leaving in a week. Jillian does not have time for that level of distraction. With Jackson nearby, events to coordinate, a bride to please, and an ex-fiancé to dodge, her peaceful life’s getting crazy fast. With any luck, she’ll survive the week and put the whole thing behind her as soon as possible.
…But not if Jackson has anything to say about it.
“You used to cause quite a stir,” Jackson said into Jillian’s ear. “I bet you haven’t danced since you came home.”
Jillian smiled the demure smile she’d perfected long ago and slipped out into the night beside Danielle. A laugh split her friend’s face, and Danielle hollered into the night sky. Watermelon Crawl boomed from the truck speakers. An outrageous smile spread across Jillian’s face until her cheeks ached. Memories flooded over her, and she was instantly 10 years younger. Her muscles tingled, and the steps came back like a reflex to the sound of her friends’ laughter and the sight of embers floating in the night sky.
Her skirt swung left and right along with her toe. Material caught her thighs and infused her with energy. Beth’s squeal blasted out of the kitchen door, and she nearly took Jillian down dashing onto the dirt beside her.
Nothing mattered. How could anything matter?
The small troop of dancers stomped and turned in the firelight. Fireflies and golden embers floated and blinked against the deep navy blue sky. No walls contained them; no neighbors complained about the noise; no traffic sounds interrupted the cricket and bullfrog chorus. There was no more freedom on earth than she had right there. A round of clapping went up as the bodies slowed and ambled in place, laughing and congratulating one another. They still had it.
Giggles seasoned the air, and the music changed smoothly to another lifelong favorite. Fishin’in the Dark . She thought of all the groomsmen planning to night fish before Mrs. Prattle’s punch kicked in the night before. In a flash, men and women sided up ready to twirl and swing in pairs. For a moment, Jillian stepped back to watch the couples, but a massive shadow blocked the light from the fire. Jackson hitched an eyebrow and nodded her way.
In the space of a heartbeat, the group was in motion, and so was she.
“You haven’t lost it, I suppose,” he said as their bodies came together.
She made the most of the time they were apart, enjoying his audience, strutting her stuff. When they met again she said, “You’ve noticed.”
“Honey, every man in town’s noticed.”
The couples began to swing, but Jillian found her body airborne. Like a feather in the wind, her feet swung left then right of Jackson’s hips. Clapping and hooting
ensued. No sooner was she grounded again than she began to twirl. The rush of endorphins and joy shot up from her feet to her hair, and her heart threatened to fly her to the moon.