Travel Often

“I see my path, but I don’t know where it leads. Not knowing where I’m going is what inspires me to travel it.” — Rosalia de Castro

Love Deeply, but Laugh Along the Way

"Happiness is only real when shared." - Jon Krakauer, Into the Wild

View Marriage as an Adventure

"Love is a flower which turns into fruit at marriage." ~Finnish Proverb

Fuel your body with GOOD (It's the only one you get)

He who has health has hope; and he who has hope has everything. - Arabian Proverb

Open your Soul to Motherhood

A Grand Adventure is About to Begin - Winnie the Pooh

A New Kind of Love is Born

Mothers hold their children's hands for a short while, but their hearts forever.

Monday, September 17, 2012

Writing Mommy-Style


Can you still be a writer AND a mom?
 
I think most of you know I have this major dream of becoming a writer. Sometimes I can even visualize myself as a published author. This is how it plays out.... Supermom to my son Jackson by day, writing and living out my dream by night AND being able to provide for the three of us. I don't want to give myself false hope, but that is what I see. Yet sometimes things don't always happen as quickly as we'd like them too or at all like we planned them. And we have to keep trying until maybe...just maybe... one day that new door of exciting opportunity will open for us.

Yes, oh, yes...it's easier to give up on all those personal goals and dreams than keep fighting for them sometimes. Okay, a LOT of times. But those who keep at it and keep believing are usually the ones who grow and make it. 

Back in 2010, I wrote my first novel and then in 2011 started to query it out to agents. I had a lot of bites, but no offers of representation. What I did get was a lot of great feedback from agents and learned a lot about my writing and the ins and outs of the publishing industry. In short, it's very subjective out there. Currently I have a few requests out to read my first 100 pages of my manuscript (yay!) but am also in the midst of revising from all the feedback I have received.

The problem I'm dealing with is finding time. I work full time. I have a five month old. I'm a wife. I am the keeper of our finances and house and nutrition....OK...pretty much everything. So how does one still follow her dream, not lose sight of oneself and all those big goals, AND still be a good mom and wife?

I don't want to lose myself! I'm deathly scared I am and sometimes I cry because I grieve the old Christie and the life I used to have. Oh...all that time I used to have. Where did it go? And all that control... buh bye. 

While writing my first book, I joined a critique group. This group is full of wonderful woman - with all different backgrounds. Some are just getting married, one lives in Brazil, others are having babies and one is a full-time mom of three kids. I can relate to her. She's quite the amazing woman. She drinks coffee like water, sleeps little and powers through novel after novel, even finding time to read too. I admire her so much and asked her how she does it.

In honor of her latest book, Love Blossoms, coming out (which I was able to critique for her), she wrote a guest post on my blog!!! This is how awesome she is. She even makes time to leave a post for me. Wow. Where on earth does she find the time, you ask???? Read below...

Writing Mommy-Style

Hi, Christie! First, let me thank you for inviting me over to your blog. I’m super excited to be here. It’s been seven months since my debut novella launched the new Honey Creek imprint at Turquoise Morning Press. Now, I’m back with book two in my Seeds of Love series. I’m hooked on this enchanting little town and can’t keep myself away for long. But, sometimes, life demands I leave the books alone. A mommy’s life is like that.
The fabulous Julie - author (and mommy) of Seeds of Love Series
 
 


My youngest child is four now. She was a tiny little thing when I started writing. She was waking a few times a night and nursing every time I turned around. I had a potty training son at the time and was starting my first year as a home schooling mom for my five year old. Times were crazy. Time was nutty nuts wrapped in nougat. And I discovered writing helped me feel sane in the midst of it all.

Four years have passed since that time. I’m still out of shape and caffeine addicted. (Some things didn’t change). But, I’m still in survival mode. Today’s format is just different. It’s still a circus over here. Things get easier, but more complicated. I get more sleep and I’m done changing diapers, but my kids need more things than they used to. Rides to ball games and gifts for friends’ parties. Homework help replaced potty training, and dating advice will soon replace that too. I’m glad to have something just for me, even if I don’t get as much time as I want to do it today. Words makes me happy. I try to find time to read and write when I can because it’s my escape. Thanks to the Kindle, I learned to read on the treadmill. Multi-tasking at its finest. And it makes me a nicer person. Trust me. My love of writing will be here when they’re gone.

I think having an escape is the key to semi-sanity. And really, semi-sanity is what I aspire to these days. Sadly, as my kids grow, they need me less and less. *sniffles* And one day my house will be spotless because I will be alone all day, wishing the house was still cluttered with kids and their friends eating chips on my couch and wearing shoes on my carpet. But that’s then, and this is now. Today, I’m trying really hard to embrace the now because too soon I know it will be gone.

About Julie:

Mother of three, wife to a sane person and Ring Master at the Lindsey Circus. Most days you'll find me online, amped up on caffeine & wielding a book.

You can find my blogging about the writer life at Musings from the Slush Pile

Tweeting my crazy at @JulieALindsey

Reading to soothe my obsession on GoodReads

And other books by me on Amazon

If you’re in the mood for a sweet romantic read with a very happy ending, I hope you’ll visit Honey Creek. The sun is setting, bullfrogs are croaking and the crickets are singing, “Come on.” Sweet tea or hot cider. Fresh summer strawberries or crisp fall apples. You’ll find it there. And taking a trip to Honey Creek is as easy as Amazon : ) I hope to see you there!

Love Blossoms:

Jillian thought she had everything she needed until Jackson walked through her door…

There’s a wedding coming to Honey Creek and the whole town’s preparing for the party. When Jillian Parker agreed to host a few groomsmen at her inn, she had no idea what she was getting into. One of those groomsmen is Jackson Tate, and he’s making her concentration completely impossible. He’s funny, fascinating, frustrating, and leaving in a week. Jillian does not have time for that level of distraction. With Jackson nearby, events to coordinate, a bride to please, and an ex-fiancé to dodge, her peaceful life’s getting crazy fast. With any luck, she’ll survive the week and put the whole thing behind her as soon as possible.

…But not if Jackson has anything to say about it.

Excerpt:

“You used to cause quite a stir,” Jackson said into Jillian’s ear. “I bet you haven’t danced since you came home.”

Jillian smiled the demure smile she’d perfected long ago and slipped out into the night beside Danielle. A laugh split her friend’s face, and Danielle hollered into the night sky. Watermelon Crawl boomed from the truck speakers. An outrageous smile spread across Jillian’s face until her cheeks ached. Memories flooded over her, and she was instantly 10 years younger. Her muscles tingled, and the steps came back like a reflex to the sound of her friends’ laughter and the sight of embers floating in the night sky.

Her skirt swung left and right along with her toe. Material caught her thighs and infused her with energy. Beth’s squeal blasted out of the kitchen door, and she nearly took Jillian down dashing onto the dirt beside her.

“Wooooo!”

Nothing mattered. How could anything matter?

The small troop of dancers stomped and turned in the firelight. Fireflies and golden embers floated and blinked against the deep navy blue sky. No walls contained them; no neighbors complained about the noise; no traffic sounds interrupted the cricket and bullfrog chorus. There was no more freedom on earth than she had right there. A round of clapping went up as the bodies slowed and ambled in place, laughing and congratulating one another. They still had it.

Giggles seasoned the air, and the music changed smoothly to another lifelong favorite. Fishin’in the Dark . She thought of all the groomsmen planning to night fish before Mrs. Prattle’s punch kicked in the night before. In a flash, men and women sided up ready to twirl and swing in pairs. For a moment, Jillian stepped back to watch the couples, but a massive shadow blocked the light from the fire. Jackson hitched an eyebrow and nodded her way.

In the space of a heartbeat, the group was in motion, and so was she.

“You haven’t lost it, I suppose,” he said as their bodies came together.

She made the most of the time they were apart, enjoying his audience, strutting her stuff. When they met again she said, “You’ve noticed.”

“Honey, every man in town’s noticed.”

The couples began to swing, but Jillian found her body airborne. Like a feather in the wind, her feet swung left then right of Jackson’s hips. Clapping and hooting

ensued. No sooner was she grounded again than she began to twirl. The rush of endorphins and joy shot up from her feet to her hair, and her heart threatened to fly her to the moon.


 

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Peek into a Working Mom's Day with a 4.5 Month Old


We seem to always want what we don't have at the moment
I was telling a couple people the other day how I’m kind of grateful I was single for eight years while in my twenties. If I knew back then I’d be saying this now, I think I would’ve cried. Overtime, I’ve started to accept that God did have a plan for me back then and still does now. He works in such ways…
Why? Well, back then I learned how to become self-sufficient and I learned a lot about myself and that not everything comes easy. That was really the time I became an adult. And I needed to become one before I ever became a mom to Jackson - to be the best mom. I loved how one of my high school friends wrote on my Facebook wall, “God knew that YOU would be the perfect mom for Jackson.  Thanks Megan! Needed to hear that.
Trying out his Johnny Jump Up for the first time
 

Back then, I whined a lot about how I wished I could find someone to take care of me. I wanted someone with man muscles to buy the 40 pound bag of salt for my water softener and pour it in for me. I wanted someone else to have to remember to change the furnace filters and pay bills, manage the money. I wanted someone to tell me not to worry about money and pay for everything. To change the batteries in the smoke detectors and a flat tire on my car. To balance the checkbook. To have meals waiting for me. I wanted someone to clean all four toilets and empty the dishwasher.
But most of all I just wanted someone to LOVE me for me.
I wanted… I wanted… I wanted…
And I waited.
It was clear this person did not exist…or at least I needed to change my expectations a little.
What I needed was to be single and learn the responsibilities of life. I needed to be patient and just let things be.  "My time would come," I'd hear from a zillion people.
TIMING was everything. Timing IS everything. I realize this more and more the older I get.
This world revolves around time a lot.
Now that I’m a mom… There is NEVER down time. Ever. There are no happy hours. No volleyball games after work. No quick trips to the mall. My break right now is the 20-minute drive from work to daycare Monday through Friday. I don’t count the drive into work because I’m still waking up. Yesterday I didn’t even remember where I was driving to and realized I missed my turn and was going in the wrong direction. Oh, the joys!

A typical day during the work week goes something like this. I’ll start from 12:01 a.m. – a brand new day!

1:20 a.m. Feeding time. Jackson rolls around in his crib like mad (butt high up in the air) and his head crashes into the railings waking him and us up. If he won’t calm down, I change his diapers (sometimes Karl will help with this!) snuggle him up and feed him. Once done eating, I put him back down.
Butt high!
 

2:00 a.m. Mom goes back to bed. Usually I’ll fall asleep within 15 minutes. Usually.

5:30 a.m.  Alarm is set to go off for work (I have YET to hear it go off – Jackson gets to me first). This gives me enough time to feed Jackson. If his last feeding is anywhere before 2:30 a.m., I feed him again before we drop him off at daycare. If it’s after 2:30, I can sleep until 6:00!!!!! Woot.

6:00 a.m. If I feed him at 5:30, I put a sleepy Jackson back into his crib and jump in the shower. I think about shaving my legs, but that requires too much work. I pretend to sleep as I stand under the water. Quickly apply makeup, sing to Karl to get up (he grunts) and I head downstairs.

6:30 a.m. Water outside plants. Fill out a report for Jenna (home care) to let her know when Jackson ate last, how he slept, and any other notes. Grab frozen bags of breast milk if I need to. Fix myself oatmeal, fill my pumping machine bag with bottles and lids off the drying rack, pump parts, hands-free bra, cooler bag and ice pack. Make sure Jackson’s travel bag has extra pair of clothes in it, with his hat and any teething toys. Sing again to Karl to get up but this time from the bottom of the stairs (it gets louder). Turn on the news. Start coffee. Eat oatmeal. Make sure bowl for rice cereal is out for Jackson, spoon is ready for when I get home from work.

6:45 a.m. Swallow vitamins. Pull out our healthy lunches. Go upstairs and get dressed, fix hair, give Jackson a kiss goodbye and smooch up Karl who is now looking at me like a tired desperate puppy dog, begging for more sleep.

7:00 a.m. Head for work. Try to find a radio station with music, no talking. Hard to do. I need music. Pop in a CD that skips over and over. Fight traffic. Guzzle coffee. Can’t tell you what I think about…other than I just try to wake up.

7:30 a.m. Arrive at work. Email Jenna to make sure Jackson arrived and all is well. She usually gets to me first and gives me a happy report. Then my work day begins.

9:00 a.m. First pumping session. Check in on Jackson. Go over my To-Do list for week. Check email, Facebook, look for easy, healthy recipes on Pinterest (saving grace). Review drafts of any blog posts.

9:30-12:00 Work

12:00 Second pumping session. Check in on Jackson. Go over my To-Do list for week. Hope to cross some things off. Check email, Facebook, look for recipes on Pinterest (saving grace). Review drafts of blog posts.

12:30-12:45 Eat lunch at desk most days. Try to step away for a little bit. Sometimes will call my momma! Sometimes will take 30 minutes to run an errand. Sometimes will just go on a quick walk to breathe.

12:45-2:00 Work

2:00 Go wash all pumping parts in lunchroom.

2:05-3:00 Work

3:00 Third pumping session. Check in on Jackson. Go over my To-Do list for week. Keep adding to it…

3:30-4:00 Work

4:00 Grab bottles of milk from work fridge and ice pack. Calculate how much I pumped for the day. Head out of the door. Tie up hair, roll down windows, turn up music and sing on top of my lungs. Think about if I’ll get to work out. Or if I’ll have enough energy to write a few pages in my manuscript.  What was I going to make for dinner again? Who was I supposed to call back?

4:30 Pull up to home care. Melt when I see Jackson. Nothing else matters except him at that moment. Give him his medicine (needs to take it 30 minutes before eating). Chat with Jenna and her adorable kids. Leave feeling SO blessed to have found her. EVERY TIME.

*4:30-5:00 Drive home. Read Jackson’s report from Jenna at all the stoplights. Find out when he ate last. When he pooped. His last diaper change. The things he did. How much he ate in ounces. Figure in if I’ll have to pump any extra times to make up for any of the ounces drank. Wonder where that milk will come from? Feeling tapped out. Stress about it. Will I make it to 6 months? 7? A full year of breast feeding?

5:00 Grab all ten things of stuff from my car and set them inside. Grab Jackson (who is usually sleeping) and haul him in. Quickly pull out dirty pump parts from bag and put them next to sink. Take out all four bottles of milk and stick them in the fridge. Fill his bowl with cereal and pour b-milk in it – stir up. Pull out recipe for dinner I’ll be making. Try to make it to the bathroom quick before Jackson stirs.

5:15 Pull out an awake Jackson from his car seat. Hug him and kiss him to pieces. Tell him how much I love him and miss him. Breathe him in. YUMMY. Change him if I need to upstairs. Grab My Brestfriend to nurse him after he eats solids. Stir up his rice cereal again. Set him in his highchair. Put a bib on him and start feeding him. He tries to grab spoon every time. Not the cleanest moment.

5:30 Nursing time. Check Facebook, email and any missed calls. Maybe watch a show I DVRd. Who was that person I was supposed to try and get back to? I breathe and listen to myself. Rub Jackson’s hair and head.

6:00 PLAY TIME with Jackson. Tons of fun!
I'm gonna start walking soon!
 

6:30 Turn TV on for a second to record Wheel of Fortune. Shut off. Run back and forth from kitchen to Jackson playing. Pull out ingredients for dinner. Try whipping together a healthy meal as best I can.

7:00 Eat. Jackson begins to get fussy. Rubs eyes. Cleanup is not an option. Sometimes we try to fit in a walk here.

7:30 KARL HOME!!!!!!!!!! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. Smoochie and huggie bear time. He takes Jackson and will either watch Wheel of Fortune or give Jackson a bath. Sometimes I get to watch Wheel too!I clean up as fast as I can (empty and fill dishwasher) and put leftovers in containers for lunch.
Me likey Whole Grain Rice Cereal
 

7:45 Rats. Didn’t clean up everything or transfer bottles to bags yet. Go upstairs to nurse Jackson. Stick to our nightly schedule of bath or dimmed lights, nurse, book, goodnight prayers and bed.

8:15 Jackson in crib. Sometimes he’s out even before I get him there. Sometimes it’s a little bit of crying. If we mess with the schedule, it’s full out screaming.

8:25 Back downstairs to finish what I started. Karl is back working (but at least I get to see his face)and playing Words with Friends against my brother Mike or talking to his dad. I transfer b-milk from bottles to bags. Bags in freezer. Make sure one bottle is left in fridge so I can add to solids. Clean all parts and bottles first. Hang to dry. Think about pumping. No desire to. When would I?

8:45 Sometimes I’ll have a bowl of ice cream.  Sometimes I’ll throw myself on the couch for 2 minutes.  Sometimes I’ll bust out a draft for a blog post to review while I’m pumping at work the next day.

9:00 SO DEAD TIRED. Up to bed I go. I open one page of a magazine and realize I’m too tired to read anything. Set my alarm, then wonder why I’m even setting it. Say goodnight to my best.

10:00 Sleeping. If my brain shuts off...

*We now have Karl’s parents watch Jackson on Tuesdays. Win win for everyone! This means Karl goes and picks him up after work (if he can and doesn’t have a load of patients) and I CAN GO WORK OUT!!!!!!!!!!
Right now weekends pretty much follow the above, minus pumping and working. Instead there is laundry, cleaning, grocery shopping, errands, walking outside and nursing and a lot more playing! Oh, and usually family wants to see us.
So yeah…there are days I wonder why I didn’t enjoy those 8 years a little more. And I get mad at myself for wishing for a different life back then than the one I was walking in. To me, it was pretty AWESOME. That brings me to the question… would I trade this new life in? Not for anything!!!! Bring it on!
Every man dies. Not every man truly lives.

-William Wallace

Trip to Arizona: A Different Kind of Travel with Baby - Month 4.5

21 weeks

I keep meaning to blog about our trip to Arizona, but I can't believe how quickly time slips away from me these days. Little crazy.
Jackson's first trip to Carefree, Arizona


To recap, we flew to Carefree, Arizona over Labor Day weekend (stretched it to a longer weekend), met some of my family out there and were able to experience the first-time joys of traveling with a little one.

If you take anything from this post, here it is in short...

Before going on vacation as first-time parents, limit your expectations (know this will most likely not be like any of your other vacations in the past and keep an open mind). Discuss any expectations you might have with your significant other going into the trip. Such as, "Honey bear, I can't wait to get up and go for a run every morning." (Hint: You'll have to work out a system if you really do want to get a run in.) or "Sweet cheeks, I'm so looking forward to sleeping in and taking a nap every afternoon." (Hint: Not really gonna happen.) Yes, these things seem ridiculous to discuss because in your old life, you could just do them. But you're a family now and dads and moms have different roles and sometimes when you're not in the other person's shoes, you don't realize all that's going on with them or quite get what they are thinking...or why they are doing the things they are doing. So trust me on this one. Expectations need to be discussed.
I love looking at myself in the mirror! (not talking about Karl either...)


I also want to mention that I mainly blog not because I want to be a drama mama, but because I need to let out what's on my mind and sometimes that's hard to get out in person or over the phone (my brain doesn't work that fast anymore. I need time to let things settle and think things through before I speak because I never know if it's the over-dramatic, over-tired Christie coming out or the real Christie. I don't want people to get the wrong impression.) or I don't quite have the time like I used to to even have a conversation (lots of interruptions these days and a packed schedule) AND because sometimes when I ask newer moms how things are going, I hear about how awesome every little thing is. Say what? How? No freakin' way. I hear about how their babies go down at the same time every night. How their relationship with their husband is better than ever. That everything seems so easy and amazing.  ???

Whatever.

I can't help but wonder...OK... HELLO???? What is wrong with me? What am I doing wrong? What am I missing? Why can't I have perfect? Why am I such a freak-a-zoid about some things???

So this is why I blog. Not because I have a zillion of hours on my hand, but because it's how I get things out and feel better about stuff (and myself) and I want to share the truth. You can't have perfect. There is no way. I'm sure things are amazing for a lot of people... I look at Giuliana and Bill Rancic. They waited years to have a baby and now Edward is here. Yes, I'm sure they are over the moon right now and don't care how much sleep they are losing. Or I follow Snooki on Twitter... Yeah, don't ask me why. But I wonder how she's managing to fit shoe shopping into her day. She's not tired? She's not dragging? She's not crying at everything???

Something must be wrong with me.

Then I hear back from others who are silently going through a lot of the same things I am and can relate. They *get* it too. I've learned it's OK to admit what's going on inside. I like you a lot better if you just admit..."THIS IS HARD!" I guarantee you're not alone. And the last thing on my mind is, "Whoa...she's failing, big time." Ummm, no. Been there. Done that. If anything, I want to HUG you!

Let's be honest here. I love Karl to pieces. I really do love being a mom. Jackson is my everything. I am pretty happy... But still... There are those days and moments (pretty much every day) where you question everything and realize this mom stuff isn't easy... and probably never will be. Parenthood is hard work and takes a ton of effort. But at the same time it's also VERY rewarding, super amazing and keeps getting better and better. It's the weirdest thing!

Now...back to vacation. (If you call it that...)

In the past, without kids, you could pretty much do whatever you wanted, whenever you wanted and nobody would grumble about it. It's a new adventure with a baby.

And if you're nursing, you will more likely be the one who will recognize the changes the most. And you'll end up feeling a titch bitter when the vacation you had hoped for, turns out nothing like you expected. Catch my drift? So yeah...OPEN YOUR MOUTH.
This kids smile melts my heart every time


The exciting moments:
Jackson swam in a pool for his first time! So much fun to watch. He seemed to love it. We didn't spend too much time out in the pool because we didn't want the little guy to burn from the hot Arizona sun (my sunscreen was confiscated by the airport. Boo-hiss!) but we wanted him to experience the pool a couple times. Funny part was I bought his swim trunks when I first found out I was pregnant, figuring I was having a boy. They were $.97 on sale - not a huge loss if Jackson turned out to be a girl. Then I went to Old Navy the day before we left for our trip and saw the matching swim shirt (a year later) for $.97 too!!! The trunks were a little big, but super cute. And boy....did he kick those legs.
First swim in the pool. Thinking about it....
He's liking it!
Loving it!!! And loves swimming with daddy!


Jackson was able to meet my grandma and my aunts and uncles out in Arizona for the first time. Growing up, I only saw my mom's side one time a year for 2 to 3 weeks at a time. That was it. So I'm glad he was able to meet everyone at only 4.5 months.
Jackson's Great Uncle Dave and Great Grandma Edith
Jackson LOVED Great Uncle Mark. Smiled every single time he saw him

Great Aunt Doris loved speaking German to Jackson


Jackson began teething. OK...how is this exciting, you ask? Exactly. But it's a first and needed to be noted because he was extra fussy and I'm not sure this was because of his teeth, new environment, strange schedule or the different time zones. Could have been many things... Tried to just go with it.
Me? Teething? Fussy? Naaaah. I'm too cute.


Jackson experienced his first flight. I mentioned this before in my post about flying with a baby. I don't think he quite knew what was going on but all in all, everything turned out OK. We survived!
First flight


Jackson absolutely LOVES being outside. He can't get enough of it. He stared at the mountains and cactus and birds flying by. If we ever needed to calm him down, taking him outside was the ticket. No matter how hot.
Our nature boy.


On to the other stuff....

Before we left, I had all these ideas about how relaxing our trip to Arizona would be and that I'd finally be getting some kind of break, only because Carefree, Arizona always stands up to its name. There's always time to hike up Black Mountain. Time to walk/run in the morning...to breathe in the fresh air. Time to sit outside and read through magazines and sip coffee and soak up the beautiful scenery. Time to read a book. To nap. Time to walk down the street to the local resort and sit pool side and order cocktails, finishing up in the hot tub. Time to sun bathe and swim laps.
Grandpa and Grandma Powalish soaking up Jackson as much as they could


Oh my, my... How vacation changes with a little one. Ninety eight percent of the time I was stressing out because Jackson was fussier than normal, wasn't going down for his naps, not sleeping through the night and could never be left alone. I needed to keep reminding myself he's still a little guy and needs lots and lots of attention. In short: there was no downtime for momma. And it probably wouldn't have been so hard if I had let Karl into my world a little more from the beginning.

I shouldn't say "no" time. I did have some quick quiet moments. I was able to get one 40 minute run/walk in early in the morning and was able to sit outside and read all four pages of one of my magazines and get two sips of coffee in. And I was able to sit outside a couple times in the sun (frantically checking the baby monitor every 30 seconds). I also had to be in bed around 8 just so I would get enough sleep through the night. Kind of crazy.
Schedule was a titch messed up, so sleeping anywhere worked for us!


Everything is ALWAYS a learning experience when you become a mom. But at the same time, you must at least try going about your normal daily life...and then learn from it. For instance, I learned a lot on our first vacation and I'm glad to have it under my belt now. I'm ready for next time!

This time around I spent a lot of time downstairs in a dark bedroom by myself nursing Jackson while everyone else enjoyed drinks and good conversation. I felt totally left out. I LOVE Jackson and the bonding experience that comes with nursing, but it's not often my family is together. AND I WAS MISSING THEM. Plus, we don't get to Arizona a lot either. I clearly could've worked up the nerve to nurse in front of everyone, but I'm still not there. *Sigh*. There are insecurities I still struggle with. And I get frustrated when they get the best of me. But now I know for next time.

In the end, I was kind of bummed I didn't come home recharged and rearing to go, but I will say I still enjoyed the time we did have. Karl and I both took Tuesday off to catch up on laundry and work around the house, and that felt more like a vacation to me than any of the days in Arizona. Kind of weird. Like I said before... limit those expectations and just go with it.

Mostly, I'm glad Jackson was able to get see family and experience a new state. I love that little guy.

Learn anything on your first vacation together?


Monday, September 10, 2012

Why I Love Change


Oh, change, how I love thee

No sarcasm here. 

Since my life is a big ball of change, I thought….Why not join in the fun and add to it all? Why fight it? Why freak out at everything and why not just GO WITH IT?

If only every day were this easy.

On that note, I went to my fabulous stylist on Saturday and had her give me a new look. I basically said, “Work your magic. Karl is letting me cut my hair.”

Buh-bye long blonde hair. Lots of inches gone.
New Look for Me - New Look for My Blog!


I figured:
  1. My hair goes up in a ponytail 99.9 percent of the time right now, who’s really going to notice?
  2. My hair is falling out due to all those post-pregnancy hormones. Most of it is on the carpet and in the drain.
  3. My hair hasn't been this short since junior year in high school. It is time.

And I love it. She is good.

Karl…well…he’s a long hair kind of guy. He did say it looked cute and I looked like a different person. (Are you thinking what I'm thinking?) Otherwise, not much else. Jackson pulled on it and played with the strands as he nursed. It was kind of cute.

After giving myself a new look, I decided to give this blog a makeover too. It’s been a year since I changed it up. I wanted to make it easier for users to navigate and link to social media and email me and I really wanted to add some cool bells and whistles to it that I could never do or figure out in Dynamic View. So here you have it. I had all but 25 minutes to spend on it last night after I put Jackson down and still managed to get six hours of sleep (in a row!). Score.

New look for me. 

New look for my blog.

Changes will keep happening to the blog as I get a little more extra “me” time each night… And I say this lightly. Change is good. Change is good. 


Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Flying with Baby - Month 4

Jackson's first flight at 4 1/2 months old

Flight from MSP to PHX at 9:55 p.m.


We survived our first flight with Jackson from Minneapolis to Phoenix - a 3 hour trip. Phew! We planned to leave late at night so he could sleep most of the time. On the way home we also tried to stick to a later flight time. I *tried* (hard) not to be a nervous wreck and told myself to go with it, but at times that can be hard. After all, I'm a first time mom.

The thing with me is I've traveled to Greece and Ireland with just a backpack and wore the same sweater 10 days in a row while in Italy. I've stayed in random hostels and made friends with bed bugs. I lived in a coat closet while missioning in Peru. Our plane went on strike for 10 hours in Italy. We got on the wrong train in Rome. We battled snow storms on our 26-hour flight to South Africa. I thought I was pretty well versed in travel.

The bottom line is no matter what kind of traveler you are, traveling with a baby takes on a whole new meaning. But I'm here to say stressing and worrying does zero good. For everyone.

Just breathe, go with it and hang on for the possibility of a bumpy ride. My motto was to continue to list off things I was grateful for in my head the entire time so I'd remain positive.

Below are a few tips I learned:

1. Give yourself plenty of time to pack.
I started packing the Sunday before we left. Karl looked surprised when he saw me wheel out the suitcase. "You're already packing? It's only Sunday."

I threw a few of my clothes in the suitcase and kind of thought, yeah, he's right. Why am I already packing? (Side note: Because I am smart, that's why!)

We weren't leaving until Thursday after work... I'd have plenty of time...

Wrong.

Our flight didn't leave until 9:55 p.m. on Thursday but we had to leave the house by 6:30 and both of us were working a full day. The plan was to drive to the airport, park nearby and take the Park N Fly (thanks to my older brother who let us use his weekly parking pass) and we'd check bags. (FYI- No, you don't need to strap baby in with the shuttle bus's seat belts while riding the Park N Fly in Minnesota. I kept Jackson in his car seat and set him on my lap.) We also had a stroller and a car seat to get through security. And this was the first time we were traveling with a baby. We weren't sure how long everything would take and wanted to allow plenty of time. I realized once Thursday hit, I never again had looked at the suitcase because I worked my eight hour days and played with Jackson once I got home until bedtime. Karl was working well past seven every night that week, so that left me to do it all (all you single moms out there...GOD BLESS YOU. How on earth do you do it???). By the time 9:00 hit, I was in bed and packing was the furthest thing from my mind. I was exhausted.

But when the clock struck 6:00 p.m. on Thursday and I had just finished nursing Jackson, I realized I still hadn't officially packed and I had thirty minutes to get dinner on the table and get everything together. I was like a tornado zipping through the house. The worse part: I couldn't find Jackson's birth certificate - the one thing I needed to make sure I had. Complete madness. So my advice. PACK EARLY.

2. Contact your airlines ahead of time
I had all these questions. Could I bring my b-milk through security without getting questioned for it? Could it be more than 3 ounces per bottle? What about his medicine? Would that be okay? Could I bring my b-feeding pillow? What were the chances someone would ask to see Jackson's birth certificate? We flew Delta and thankfully they have this AWESOME twitter account - @DeltaAssist. Tweet a question and in less than five minutes you have a response. Super cool. And yes, you can bring b-milk with you through security.

3. Push your baby with your stroller through the airport, don't carry
We brought our beloved BOB stroller and the car seat adapter and clicked on our Chicco Keyfit 30 car seat. It seemed huge, but the whole set up is easy to take apart and piece together. Basically the system goes like this: you get to security and have to take your baby out of the car seat and you need to break the car seat away from the stroller. There can't be ANY toys hanging from the stroller's handlebar or the car seat's. They will make you remove everything from both the stroller and car seat. Then you flip the car seat upside down on the conveyor belt. They will have you walk the stroller through and will pat it down. Then, you can easily gather up all your things getting spit out of the X-Ray machine (beware of the grumpy workers who might give you attitude, but for the most part employees are pretty friendly). Soon you're putting it all together again and wheeling your baby through the airport. And your arms never get tired.

4. Gate check your stroller and car seat and luggage if you can
We checked our luggage on the way to Arizona because we were flying with my brother who is Platinum status (he's so awesome to travel with). He can check anything for free. On the way home, we had to pay for one checked bag and tote around another one. Luckily when we got to the gate, they let us check our other suitcase with our stroller and car seat. They gave us hot pink tags for our stroller and car seat so when we walked off the plane, there it was (and all put together too!)

We did not take our car seat base with us. Karl brought the car seat manual with and refreshed his memory on how to strap in a car seat with only the seat belt. Glad we took that car seat safety class before Jackson was born. Worked like a charm.

5. Check the status of the plane online before you get to the airport, then talk to the people at the gate for favors
Before leaving for Arizona, my brother checked the passenger status and saw that the flight wasn't full. Karl and I were seated in a row of three seats. I had a window seat and he had the aisle seat, and we hoped that nobody would take the seat in between us. However, when we got to the gate, we found out someone had filled the seat. My brother sweetly asked if there would be any way they could move that person to another seat. They did. And just like that, we had an open seat between us! As we were walking onto the plane and folding up the BOB, I asked one of the flight attendants if I could bring on the car seat and put it in between us. They said that if nobody was in between us, sure. YAY!!! Most people have to pay for this. We got lucky.

With that said, we traveled both ways. On the way to Arizona, we had the car seat in the empty seat between us. On the way back to Minnesota, we had to hold Jackson. If I could, I'd travel with the car seat every time. He fell asleep in that. On the way home, we passed back and forth a fussy baby.

6. Bring the Baby Bjorn just in case
We tucked the Baby Bjorn in Karl's backpack and brought it out at the airport on the way back home. Karl walked around with Jackson in it and he was happy as a clam. It was nice to be hands free and have those extra hands to pull the car seat from the stroller and fold it up.


7. Nurse (or feed) baby at take off and landing
I was nervous for this part just because I wasn't sure what would happen with nursing. Jackson has been getting so distracted when he eats lately (he pulls off every couple minutes), that I was worried he'd have issues with his ears and eating. No problems here though. As the plane pulled away, I waited as long as I could before feeding him (dealt with him fussing for a little bit) - you never know when something on the plane might break down or there is a lot of traffic on the runway. As the pilot announced "Flight attendants get ready for take off," I started to get Jackson ready. I waited for the plane to take its final turn onto the main runway and started to nurse.

That brings me to my next point. Wear a sports bra. I have special nursing bras but I have to reach up to unclasp them and my shirt will fall down and I fumble like crazy. All I had to do with the sports bra is lift my shirt and bra up and boom. Jackson was latched. No prob.

So then my next big question was...do I bring a Boppy or my Brestfriend aboard? I use these ALL THE TIME at home. I didn't have anything with me on the way to Arizona and feeding was a little uncomfortable, especially when we waited in the airport - way too many people around with nothing to stare at but me struggling. While on the airplane, my brother did hand back a blanket from First Class that I could roll up and put under Jackson's head. That helped. But I knew I wouldn't get that kind of treatment on the way back. So on the way home, I brought my Brestfriend on the plane and that made things a whole lot easier on me. I basically sat down and clipped it on me and put on my hooter hider. Yes, the pillow is a bit bulky, but comfort and convenience outweighed all that. Of course I had to wash it right when we got home because it rubbed up against so many germy things and hit the floor a hundred times.

As soon as I felt the plane descend and the pilot made his announcement that we were 25 minutes from landing, I fed Jackson again. Doesn't feel right to wake a sleeping baby, but anything I can do to prevent sore ears! Also on the flight home, I fed him a few times just so he'd stop crying. This is where breastfeeding comes in handy.

8. Have plenty of toys, diapers, change of clothes available

Jackson had his big blowout before we got to the airport on the way to Arizona, so we were good there and I didn't have any worries. I've been told that baby's tend to release more when they are on an airplane due to pressure or something. On the flight home, I made sure I had everything bundled into a simple changing pad just in case (wipes, diaper, hand sanitizer, diaper rash cream, and an extra pair of clothes and an extra shirt for me!). Jackson waited until we were inches from the ground to let 'er go. Thankfully it wasn't up the back or down the leg this time.

I followed the advice of another blogger and brought some new toys, but truthfully Jackson was more interested in the people and lights and mom and dad making faces and noises at him. So we spent the 3 hours entertaining as much as I could. I can't believe I thought I'd get through a couple magazines during the flight. Ha. Jackson would stop maybe for 10 minutes to look at a book or stick a toy in his mouth. We have learned our baby just doesn't ever sit still. Ever.

9. Bring disinfectant wipes
Planes = germ city. Even before I sat down, I already had my disinfectant wipes out and was wiping down everything - windows, arm rests, tray tables, seat belts, seat backs, etc. Yes, Karl thought I was a nut but I knew Jackson would be touching everything and anything he touched would be going directly into his mouth and eyes. 

10. Be ready for different climates
On the way to Arizona the plane was an ice box. The flight home - the air conditioner broke. You get where I'm going here? Pack for warm and cold.

What have you learned traveling with a baby?

Saturday, August 25, 2012

First Meal - 4 Months

Trying rice cereal for the first time

19 weeks postpartum

We received clearance on Monday from Jackson's pediatrician that he was ready for solids. We tried Tuesday night to feed him for the first time. As you can see from the pictures below. It didn't go so hot.
The very first time we tried feeding him on Tuesday night. Didn't go so hot.



We didn't have much luck the rest of the week because we discovered Jackson goes into major meltdown mode by 7:30. So we need to re-work a new plan. Karl wanted to be part of the first real meal and sometimes he doesn't get home until after 7:00 from work, so it's a bit hard for me to balance everything. This also makes me really nervous flying with him next week since we don't take off until 9:30. I pray for no big meltdowns!

Last night we tried rice cereal mixed with my breast milk again. Karl didn't get home until after 7 so I tried to get everything ready before the meltdown came. Just as we were feeding Jackson, the meltdown started. But he did get a couple bites in. YAY! I consider this a success for the first time. We'll see how tonight goes for feeding number two!

Second time eating!

 
 



And the video :) - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEjOq5_vCEM&feature=plcp

Friday, August 24, 2012

Four Month Check-Up

Jackson had his four month visit!!
Big news: Jackson is ready for solids!!

Weight: 13lbs 15.75 ounces (darn near 14 pounds!)
Height: 25 inches
Head: 16.25


We got Jackson a Round-a-Bout and he's diggin it!


Jackson is right on track with his size, though a little skinny...which is OK!!! (And still normal!) So crazy how every baby is SO different.

Doctor saw action Jackson in full effect. Took one look at us and said..."Whoa, this baby is going to be crawling soon!!"

We've kind of been thinking the same thing as we see him move around and push himself up full force.

Jackson practically spun himself all away around on the table once the pediatrician put Jackson on his belly. She saw how much he moves and right away asked about sleeping patterns. I said he was doing great (sleeping 10 p.m. to 5 a.m. or 9 p.m. to 4 a.m.) and then the past two weeks he's been getting up one to three times during the night. AND he's also getting 5 ounces per feeding while at home care. That's a lot of milk for a four month old! Especially one who downs it in less than five minutes and from time to time will scream after for more.

What gives!?!?!

The pediatrician said Jackson is burning through calories like crazy. He is always on the go. Always. Even in his sleep.

So we're going to try introduce solids!! Starting with Earth Best's rice cereal.


I found a book (I know, I know...I said I was done with books, but this one is more of a recipe book for babies and a guide for me because I have no idea when to feed Jackson and how much, etc.) that will help me give him the BEST foods out there. It's called Super Baby Food. I'm going to try making all his foods (except the rice cereal). I don't have time to get the brewer's yeast, add iron and all that other stuff with working full time. I'm still trying to figure out when to cook for myself and Karl. I also hear rice cereal can constipate so I plan on doing some oatmeal too. This should help keep Jackson feeling full.


The pediatrician also said to continue to pay attention to Jackson. Maybe he needs a little cereal at lunch too. We also are having Jenna (our home care) gauge his hunger. If she needs to, she'll try going up to 5.5 - 6 ounces a feeding too. AND you know what that means... More pumping. Baaaahahahaa!  Sigh. We'll see what happens here because that extra pump is a LOT of work. But I don't want our little guy starving either.

Plan is to introduce the cereal for two weeks and add a little something after, only feeding him one new thing every few days (to rule out any allergies). We tried on Tuesday but that was a NO GO. We shouldn't have even tried because he was in a middle of a 7:30 meltdown. Lesson learned.

Jackson handled his shots as well as he could. Daddy came to the rescue and made him feel all better. I do not like the whole shot part. Ugh! He got his Diphtheria, tetanus, acellular pertussis, Inactivated polio virus, H. influenza Type b, Pneumococcal conjugate and Rotavirus today. Two shots and a drink. Poor Jackson. He came down with a slight fever again (100.4) and was a little off for two days (just like how his mom gets when any form of medicine or foreign substance is introduced in the body).

Now... Back to trying to figure out a new schedule with the solid foods. Right now I feed Jackson around 5-6 p.m. after getting home from work and again at 8-9 p.m. However, this week he showed us by screaming his brains out that he is CRASHING big time by 7:30. So I'm thinking I should feed him solids when I get home from work and then give him a night time guzzle around 7:15 so he's in bed before 8. Does this make sense?? What do other people do? Suggestions please!